Thankful - I reflected looked back & realized how blessed I am.

                                              Thankful, Grateful and Blessed.

I went out for a drink with a friend of mine after not seeing each other for like 2 years, (blame it on life). We talked about a whole lot of things like what we’ve been up to in the last 2 years, most especially, our individual experiences. He spoke to me and tried to make me reason differently on a number of things and I learnt quite a lot from him and was greatly motivated by his words. We both talked about the very sensitive word LOVE, touching on God’s love, what love should mean, and how love should be interpreted.
One of the things he said to me was that love needs to be beyond the physical and should be spiritual; love should be self-sacrificing and never-ending, should be everything that's different from what we see in our society today and should be identical to how our God loves us.

So who do you love the most in this world.?

My natural response was "my brother of course", followed by my mother, father, nephew etc in that order. (Lol) and then my darling friend laughed and said to me, “The person you love most in this world is YOU!”.  

Well In my opinion, loving yourself greatly before anybody else hinders you from being able to show the kind of love God showers on us. If we cannot love like God, then we can at least try to make the other person smile. Going out of your way to see someone else smile is not a very common act in our society these days and it doesn't make us too friendly. God loves those that show love to the common man without expecting anything in return but a smile.

Family and friend are people that should love you, encourage you against all odds, be there for you when you need them, and ensure that you don't doubt their place in your life. So after our conversation, I found out that whilst moping complaining and feeling rejected, I actually have that one very special friend that has taken the place of ten friends in my life. A friend that understands you without judging, whilst at the same time helping you become a better version of you. It took a conversation about the love of God to realize it, but I do know now that I am genuinely loved, not just by my family, or friends that are selfless in all accounts, but I am genuinely loved by God, His love for me top that of family or friends and He constantly remains merciful and faithful me.

I would like to encourage someone today that God loves you, regardless of who you are or what your circumstances are, everything you lack, and your limitations, your expectations, your dreams, your brokenness…..everything is like an open book before God. Remember His word that says "we should not be anxious about anything but in thanksgiving through prayer and petition let your request be made known to Him". God has engraved you and I on the palms of His hands simply because of His genuine and unending love for us.  Do you understand the meaning of that word ‘engrave’, it simply means you cannot take it out. Once it is engraved, it is the part of the skin and there is no way to separate both. Remember your life with all its boundaries are constantly viewed by God, you’re His precious child, He loves you and He sees every moment of your life.  So stand up tall, wear a crown, count your blessing and be thankful.

Until Next time… you are loved, blessed and highly favored.

Vida Amorosa

Olori Amope xx

The 5 Reason That Cause Women To Settle!

I work in Finance and I work with 6 guys and as the only female, they have tagged me "The Female Boss on a Mission", reason best known to them. We all get along so well and chat alot and talk generally about life, relationship etc. So the other day one of my work colleague ask me why I'm not in a rush to get married, even at my age.... I was shocked, like seriously.......What a question;

He then ask if I don't get any pressure based on the fact that my friends and cousins are getting married; my response was Im not in a rush because I don't want to get married for the wrong reasons. He then said NO its because I'm too picky.(Eyes Rolling)

Well a lot of women are being too picky but aren't the majority quick to settle with someone who isn’t good enough for them?” And he’s right. However ‘settling’ is not the sole practice of the females, men settle too, crucially the difference is found in how men and women behave after they settle.


On the other hand when a woman settles she will justify her choice by claiming
a) We just don’t understand ‘him’ and he’s a good person really that he’s going to change. As a result when this woman’s mother, siblings and closest friends (justifiably) express their frustration and anger over her choice of partner she will probably dump them and not him.

I am fully aware that when a woman is determined to settle nothing (that includes cheating, violence and mental abuse) will change her mind until she comes to the personal realisation that she deserves more.

I thought I’d enlighten my readers to the top 5 reasons that cause women to settle.


1) It’s a Number Game...

As there are more women than men in the world inevitably we have a situation where there is an excessive demand for good men but a limited supply. As such a woman who is attractive, educated, intelligent, employed actually depletes the number of men available to her.

And it’s not because there aren’t enough men that embody these traits but it’s one of the cruel facts of life that the more successful a woman is the more bat shit she attracts. So it’s all in the numbers. Most of the good men have already been snapped up or have the awareness that they are rare commodities and are unwilling to be tied down.


2) She Likes the drama...

Perfect/good/normal men are boring. And there’s nothing wrong with being boring. Boring is a good thing. I like the fact that my blood pressure is boringly normal, some things just don’t need to be exciting. However some women love excitement and drama. Therefore they’d rather settle and be in a toxic relationship than be in a functional (boring) partnership.


3) The Messiah Complex...

Just as many men are attracted to crazy women, many women are attracted to damaged men. Whilst I have never met a man who has tried to rehabilitate a crazy woman, I have met countless women who engage in the Sisyphean task of trying to change a damaged man. Some say it’s because such women are naturally altruistic but I think it’s because they have Messiah complexes. Memo to the women who like to ‘save the day’- save yourself first.


4) Insecurity...

I actually wasn’t going to include this factor because it’s so cliché. You know how it is, the overweight, overpaid, overstupid American talk show host says to an overweight, unemployed and equally stupid guest ‘Girl you need to love yourself can’t you see you’re beautiful? Stop being so insecure you can do better than him girl!’


5) The (bitter) single friend/relative..

Let me give you a social fact. In every single family and female clique there is a woman who is perpetually single and very bitter about it. If you don’t believe me then the chances are you are that woman or too closely related to that woman to recognise her plight.

Becoming ‘that’ single woman is every woman’s nightmare. And it’s not that women are afraid of being single….but they’re afraid of being labelled the bitter single one. Ergo even if he cheats, steals and has a weed habit that means he finishes all the food in the fridge she’ll stick around because ‘at least I’m not Chardonnay’.

Love Life

Olori Amope xx
Follow me on twitter @oloriamope