Bad Habits That Ruin Beautiful Relationships.

We all get to that stage in our relationship where we feel completely at ease with each other, well it is only normal. But when you get so comfortable that you neglect friends, your manners e.t c then things can start going downhill.
If you want to avoid major drama in your relationship, resist the ten habits below that are known to ruin otherwise healthy relationships.



1) Criticising his/her family...
No matter how you feel about your boyfriend/girlfriend's family, making it known to him/her just how much they drive you crazy is bound to drive an irreparable wedge into your relationship. So it's best to hold your tongue when the subject of his family comes up.


2) Letting yourself go....
Not only is it bad for your health and overall well-being, but letting yourself go -- whether that means gaining weight or not caring about your appearance -- after settling into a relationship is one habit that sends a bad message to your partner: if you stop caring about yourself, he may assume that you've stopped caring about him too.


3) Forgetting your friends....
Have you ever had a friend who has suddenly partnered up with the guy/girl they’ve been raving about for the past few weeks and then you don’t see them again for months? Maybe that “friend” is actually you? We’ve all probably been guilty of this at some point in our lives. No matter how much we love spending time with our other half, it’s important to keep in regular contact with our friends for the sake of our own sanity.
Our pals remind us that there are other things going on in the world aside from romance, and they keep our feet firmly on the ground when we start getting swept off into romantic dream land. Spending all of your time with your other half usually ends up with you getting bored of each other pretty soon into the relationship and this is a recipe for disaster.


4) Spying...
You may think you're doing yourself a favor by keeping up constant surveillance your boyfriend/girlfriend's phone, Facebook and Twitter habits; however by being aware of the minutiae of his/her whereabouts and thoughts, you're more likely to do your relationship more harm than good.you get paranoid and scared for nothing. Oh never forget.... You start Nagging!


5) Fighting in Public.....
It is natural for couples to have the occasional argument, especially after being together for any significant amount of time; however, fights that become so uncontrollable that they regularly spill out into the open, damage your relationship! I say you can have arguments. But in public, among friends act like nothing is going on.


6) Sharing Your Secrets With Your Friends.... (To my dear Ladies)
Discretion is one of the chief qualities of a good relationship. Therefore, be sure to keep various aspects of your love life for yourself and your partner. Men in particular can feel extremely vulnerable and irritated if they find out about a problem or a secret from their friends and not their partner. Talk over the delicate issues with your partner rather than confessing them to your friends.


7) Trying to improve your partner....
Many women think they are helping the men that they're with by trying to make them over, however, by doing so; they only end up causing more problems for the relationship.


8) Allowing problems to fester.....
Everyone would like to think that they have the perfect relationship; however, if in your quest to avoid creating drama in your relationship, you frequently allow things that upset you to go unsaid; you are doing yourself and your partner a great disservice. Good communication is the cornerstone of any happy, long-term coupling.


9) Taking each other for granted...

• Do you turn to him/her for his thoughts and/or advice?
• Do you consider him/her when making a decision?
• Do you thank him /her when they've done something good and/or right?
• Do you thank and compliment your partner when they mean well?
• Do you listen to him/her and/or pay attention to his/her needs?


10) Lying....
Lying to your boyfriend/girlfriend for any reason does not bode well for a successful future together. Just don't do it!!






Love Life
Olori Amope xx
Follow me on twitter @oloriamope

Friends We All Have!

There are friends that we have and just can’t live without. It’s not because of their positive aspects but because of the bad they bring. Maybe they make us feel better about our own dire situations, I don’t know, but for some reason we keep them around because, lets face it. We love the drama……!


1) The friend that can’t function within a group....

They are an absolute dream one-on-one, the perfect friend, happy, easy to talk to, sober, but as soon as there are more than 3 other people in the room, they start to play up. This ranges from being a hyperactive version of themselves, to being completely silent or just making such idiotic comments. More to the point, they have absolutely no idea how to behave around strangers.
They do their best to ruin occasions for celebration, e.g on a night out to ensure all eyes are on them, they always end up drunk and miserable, crying over something that is so irrelevant and trivial, I’m stumped for a witty analogy that would adequately highlight their stupidity.

2) I am broke....

This type of friend is not poor but just really bad with money. They know the rents due, bills are due but still buy a Gucci handbag or Hermes belt. The idea of having financial obligations is a foreign concept; if they want something they will buy it, especially if they don’t need it. Despite the fact the phrase they say most is ‘I’m broke’ they ALWAYS seem to have money to buy more things and still get by despite their reckless spending.


3). The hoe (female, male and transgendered)....

Every single person on this earth has a friend/close acquaintance that is considered a hoe (I know its not the politically correct term, but harlot seems archaic and suggests they receive payment) and if you think you don’t have a hoe friend, the probability is that you are the hoe in question.
As much as you love your hoe friend to bits, you would never ever leave them around your significant other. However hoes are such joys to be around and are genuinely good people. And for all you cleaver so and sos who ask ‘what is a hoe’, I’m not going to try and define one, but believe me I know they exist…(in different area codes)!

4) Always on a diet....

So the clique decide to go out for a meal and you’ve saved up your calories for the week and you’re all going to play make-believe and pretend you don’t care about your waistlines and can eat what you like. Oh but not this friend, the size zero wannabe obsessed twit is as quick as an anorexic on speed to constantly repeat ‘Oh no I can’t eat that, far too many calories’ and makes you feel like there is something wrong in enjoying food. They often shoot condescending looks at the plumpest person at the table as if to say ‘are you really going to eat that’.

5) The Religious Fanatic....

Suddenly everything is forbidden and everyone is going to hell. They have made it their task to be a walking, talking spy for whichever God they have chosen to serve and constantly judge even though one of the main tenets of their faith is that they aren’t supposed to.
However you keep them around just in case your clique is in a dreadful car accident and their presence in the vehicle saves you all from an early demise.

6) The Bitch....

She is absolutely horrible to everyone, her friends, her family, puppies, work colleagues, even her boyfriend. She has a tongue as sharp as a razor, intent on destroying every being it comes into contact with. We only keep her around because she appeals to our wicked nature, as her cruel comments concerning the sartorially challenged choice of clothing can make nights out extremely entertaining. However when she turns on you……..Well, you wonder why someone hasn’t assassinated her yet.

7) The Pushover...

The kindest soul in the universe, yet you exploit them. You make them baby-sit your kids, borrow from them and never return (Yes Money) and drive you places you can’t pronounce. Fortunately/unfortunately (it’s all relative) pushovers are a dying breed as everyone is far too opinionated nowadays. Blame it on the credit crunch, its now everyone man/woman for themselves!


8) Always on the phone...

Their phone is either glued to their ear or fused to their fingertips. They are restricted neither by location, time or battery life (they carry their charger).
They normally own 2-3 mobiles, each with a different network, two are line rental and one is pay as you go. They justify having 3 phones because, one is for close family/friends, the other associates and the last for people they don’t want to speak to. Despite their mobile hierarchy they seem to be on all of them for equal amounts of time.
In spit of the fact their enormous phone bills are self-inflicted they still have the audacity to complain.


Love Life

Olori Amope xx
Follow me on twitter @oloriamope

My Birthday prayer.

Father lord
Today I thank You for another year in my life, thank You that I am "wonderfully" made. I thank You for the gift of life and being alive to see today and give glory to Your name.

I am so thankful and so grateful that I can say You made me to be special, And I don't have to try to be something I'm not. Even before I was born, you know me and you created me the way I was meant to be. You created me for a purpose and You love what You created in me, is such an awesome thought!

Thank you, Lord, for always answering my prayers and my "God Give me this and that prayers😃"
Thank you for being God and never less, for freeing me for wide horizons; For protecting me from my limited vision and wayward will.
I can not thank You enough for what You have done in my life and in my heart, To bring me to where I am today.

Lord I thank You because You made it known to me, that where I am in my life right now is Just mediocrity; that You have higher expectations for me.
You have taught me that I can overcome every impossible
Things and obstacles by listening to your voice; obeying You and holding Your hand every step of the way.
I know I truly am a miracle this day, on the day of my birth, it is not by my power but you made today happen.

Thank You lord for surrounding me with beautiful families and friends, I am truly blessed to have you. And I thank God for all of you.

I love You lord, praise You, I honour You. For You are worthy of all my praise.

Happy Birthday to ME!

The 5 Reason That Cause Women To Settle!

I work in Finance and I work with 6 guys and as the only female, they have tagged me "The Female Boss on a Mission", reason best known to them. We all get along so well and chat alot and talk generally about life, relationship etc. So the other day one of my work colleague ask me why I'm not in a rush to get married, even at my age.... I was shocked, like seriously.......What a question;

He then ask if I don't get any pressure based on the fact that my friends and cousins are getting married; my response was Im not in a rush because I don't want to get married for the wrong reasons. He then said NO its because I'm too picky.(Eyes Rolling)

Well a lot of women are being too picky but aren't the majority quick to settle with someone who isn’t good enough for them?” And he’s right. However ‘settling’ is not the sole practice of the females, men settle too, crucially the difference is found in how men and women behave after they settle.


On the other hand when a woman settles she will justify her choice by claiming
a) We just don’t understand ‘him’ and he’s a good person really that he’s going to change. As a result when this woman’s mother, siblings and closest friends (justifiably) express their frustration and anger over her choice of partner she will probably dump them and not him.

I am fully aware that when a woman is determined to settle nothing (that includes cheating, violence and mental abuse) will change her mind until she comes to the personal realisation that she deserves more.

I thought I’d enlighten my readers to the top 5 reasons that cause women to settle.


1) It’s a Number Game...

As there are more women than men in the world inevitably we have a situation where there is an excessive demand for good men but a limited supply. As such a woman who is attractive, educated, intelligent, employed actually depletes the number of men available to her.

And it’s not because there aren’t enough men that embody these traits but it’s one of the cruel facts of life that the more successful a woman is the more bat shit she attracts. So it’s all in the numbers. Most of the good men have already been snapped up or have the awareness that they are rare commodities and are unwilling to be tied down.


2) She Likes the drama...

Perfect/good/normal men are boring. And there’s nothing wrong with being boring. Boring is a good thing. I like the fact that my blood pressure is boringly normal, some things just don’t need to be exciting. However some women love excitement and drama. Therefore they’d rather settle and be in a toxic relationship than be in a functional (boring) partnership.


3) The Messiah Complex...

Just as many men are attracted to crazy women, many women are attracted to damaged men. Whilst I have never met a man who has tried to rehabilitate a crazy woman, I have met countless women who engage in the Sisyphean task of trying to change a damaged man. Some say it’s because such women are naturally altruistic but I think it’s because they have Messiah complexes. Memo to the women who like to ‘save the day’- save yourself first.


4) Insecurity...

I actually wasn’t going to include this factor because it’s so cliché. You know how it is, the overweight, overpaid, overstupid American talk show host says to an overweight, unemployed and equally stupid guest ‘Girl you need to love yourself can’t you see you’re beautiful? Stop being so insecure you can do better than him girl!’


5) The (bitter) single friend/relative..

Let me give you a social fact. In every single family and female clique there is a woman who is perpetually single and very bitter about it. If you don’t believe me then the chances are you are that woman or too closely related to that woman to recognise her plight.

Becoming ‘that’ single woman is every woman’s nightmare. And it’s not that women are afraid of being single….but they’re afraid of being labelled the bitter single one. Ergo even if he cheats, steals and has a weed habit that means he finishes all the food in the fridge she’ll stick around because ‘at least I’m not Chardonnay’.

Love Life

Olori Amope xx
Follow me on twitter @oloriamope

12 Relationship Truths We Often Forget

Majority of us forget the truth about relationship, and this sometimes makes your relationships more complicated than they are. After reading different articles and books, I gathered few things together, Here are simple reminders to help you keep them on track.

1) All successful relationships require some work. – Successful relationships don’t just happen, or maintain themselves. They exist and thrive when the parties involved take the risk of sharing what it is that’s going on in their minds and hearts. Open communication and honesty is the key.

2) You get what you put in. – most of the time, you get what you put in your relationship, If you want love, give love. If you want friends, be friendly. If you’d like to feel understood, try being more understanding. It’s a simple practice that works.

3) You shouldn't have to fight for a spot in someone’s life. – Never force someone to make a space in their life for you, because if they know your worth, they will create one for you. I always say to people never make someone your priority when you're only an option to them, if they know you're worth it they will make you their number one.

4)There is a purpose for everyone you meet. – People come into our life for different reasons and purpose, Some people will test you, some will use you, and some will teach you; but most importantly some will bring out the best in you. Learn to see and accept the differences between these people, and carry on accordingly.

5) We all change, which is only normal – Our needs change with time. When someone says, “You’ve changed,” it’s not always a bad thing. Sometimes it just means you stopped living your life their way. Don’t apologize for it. Instead, be open and sincere, explain how you feel, and keep doing what you know in your heart is right.

6)You are in full control of your own happiness. – happiness Is a choice you make , If your relationship with yourself isn’t working, don’t expect your other relationships to be any different. Nobody else in this world can make you happy. It’s something you have to do on your own. "And you have to create your own happiness first before you can share it with someone else. If you feel that it’s your partner’s fault, think again, and look within yourself to find out what piece is missing. "happiness is a choice you make".

7) Learn to forgive.. – Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” It doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened. It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life. (read post: letting go of the past")

8) You cannot change people; they can only change themselves. – Instead of trying to change others, give them your support and lead by example. If there’s a specific behavior someone you love has that you’re hoping disappears over time, it probably won’t. If you really need them to change something, be honest and put all the cards on the table so this person knows what you need them to do.

9) Arguments are a waste of time. – The less time you spend arguing with the people who hurt you, the more time you’ll have to love the people who love you. And if you happen to find yourself arguing with someone you love, don’t let your anger get the best of you. Give yourself some time to calm down and then gently discuss the situation.

10) You are better off without some people. – When you have to start compromising yourself and your morals for the people around you, it’s probably time to change the people around you. If someone continuously mistreats you or pushes you in the wrong direction, have enough respect for yourself to walk away from them. It may hurt for a little while, but it’ll be ok. You’ll be ok, and far better off in the long run.

11) Small gestures go a long way. – Honour your relationships in some way every chance you get. Every day you have the opportunity to make your relationship sweeter and deeper by making small gestures to show your appreciation and affection. Remember, making one person smile can change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their world. Your kindness and gratitude matters.

12) Even the best relationships don’t last forever. – People don’t live forever. Appreciate what you have, who loves you and who cares for you. You’ll never know how much they mean to you until the day they are no longer beside you. And remember, just because something doesn’t last forever, doesn’t mean it wasn’t worth your while.


Love Life
OloriAmope x

Ten Signs You Need To Leave A Relationship.

Over the time and talking from experience, ;) I have come to realise that many women and men stay in relationships even though they know they're undervaluing themselves by being there. Sometimes they’re undervaluing themselves because the other person isn't good enough or the other person genuinely can’t handle the rights and responsibilities that come with a relationship. One of the most popular phrases that people use to conclude their relationship post mortem is…..

"The signs were there early on but I ignored them" or "looking back I wish i had listened to so so person (e.g your then selfish friend)

Signs you need to leave a relationship.....unless you want it to end disastrously....!

1) They tell you they don't want to commit: " We can't take this further because I'm not ready for what you really want" so you can be in the relationship but no commitment!

2) They tell you they don't want a relationship: so why are you there?

3) All your closest friends and family have concluded they're the anti-christ.

4) You're tired of trying to change them: you can't change a person, only God can.

5) You're trying to change them: don't even try it because it won't work.

6) They told you they're not ready even at the settling down age.

7) You have massive doubts that you channel by biting your nails and screaming at the homeless.

8) Women:- They make you cry (weekly)
Men: - They cause you utter the words "I hate me" (daily)

9) You've split up and made up so many times that everybody including you is confused with your relationship status.

10) You know it’s going nowhere and definitely going no where.
My dear RUN!



Love Life
Olori Amope xx

Beauty Pageant Contestant Wobbling On High Heels.

Miss Ivory Coast 2012 beauty pageant took place recently, unfortunately for one of the contestant her high heels had other plans for her. In as much as I felt pity for this contestant at the same time I cant help but laugh.

Funny Nigerian Girl Sings Nigerian National Anthem (Must watch-So hilarious)

A break away from life issues and inspirational talk, here is something I stumbled on which believe me will make you LOL. Well I found it hilarious so I decided to share it.

Letting Go Of The Past...

Over the years and from experiences I've always thank God for all the difficult people and situations in my life and also learnt from them, this is because they have shown me exactly who I do not  want to be. I've always learn from my mistakes because it helps me let go of my past rather than hanging on to it.

When you stay stuck in regret of the life you should have had, you end up missing the beauty of what you do have. As long as you are worried about what others think of you, you are owned by them. Only when you require no approval from outside yourself can you own yourself. We must let go of the life we had planned so we can enjoy the life that is waiting for us. Sometimes the paths we take are long and hard, But remember, these paths are often the ones that lead to the most beautiful views.

We sometimes spend too much time living in the 'what if' and need to learn to live in the 'what is.' Every moment you get is a gift, so spend it on things that matter. Don't spend it by dwelling on unhappy things. We all have time machines. Some take us back, they're called memories. Others take us forward, they're called dreams and anyone who has lost something they thought was theirs forever finally comes to realize that nothing really belongs to them. Holding on to the unchangeable past is a waste of energy, and serves no purpose in creating a better future and  Keeping baggage from the past will leave no room for happiness in the future. You cannot erase the past; you must let it go. You cannot change yesterday; you must accept the lessons learned. Expect something good to happen to you today no matter what occurred yesterday because the past no longer holds you captive. It can only continue to hurt you if you hold on to it. Let it go. Sometimes you've got to emotionally let go of the things that once meant a lot to you, so you can move beyond the past and the pains they bring you, and open the next chapter in your life.

I've come to realise that one of the hardest lessons in life is letting go. Whether it's guilt, anger, love, loss, etc. Change is never easy - you fight to hold on, and you fight to let go. Don't let your shoulda's, coulda's and woulda's of yesterday determine your can's and will's of today. Don't allow worry, fear, and doubt to cloud your mind. Fear of what lies ahead can make it tough to let go of a bad relationship, but you must not be afraid to move on and discover how beautiful of a person you really are, and how bright the world really is.

Stop wasting time regretting what you did a year ago.  I as a person don't  believe in regret, id rather learn from my mistakes than say i regret ever doing something,  living in regrets can draw us back and make us stagnant. Because we are busy regretting the past it makes us divert and not focus on what we want to achieve in d future.  Start doing what you have to do now, so that in a year's time you wont regret what you did today. Be thankful for what you have: very very important, in every situation, always give thanks. I know so many times some of us think why am i here? I dont like my position, im tired etc. well You have no idea how many people would love to have what you've got or would love to be in your shoes. 

Do you really want to look back on your life and see how wonderful it could have been had you not been afraid to live it? Live your life to the fullest cos YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE! (YOLO).

Love Life

Olori Amope xx
Follow me on twitter @olori_amope