Forgiveness - The Sensible & Healthy Choice.

Forgiveness is a vital aspect of life, be it in relationships, friendships, or in our day to day activities. We should always learn to forgive regardless of how we have been wronged after all, to err is human and to forgive is divine! I used to marvel at how someone could forgive another who had deeply hurt them, then I had an experience that helped me see the pathway to forgiveness and understand how important it is to my health.
“Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret--it leads only to evil."
Don’t fret; I am not going to start quoting the Bible to give you unending reasons why you should forgive. Forgiveness is a choice so I'll leave that choice to you, whilst at the same time, hoping you make the sensible one. See you need to realize that forgiveness actually begins and ends with you, not the person at fault. You have to be prepared to accept and come to terms with whatever it is you're mad about, only then can you open up your heart to forgive. Anger is one of the most vicious emotions we humans have, alongside love, jealousy, obsession, possessiveness, and hatred. Most times, anger affects our physical well-being and health in various ways and makes us totally irrational, if not destructive and most importantly anger generally affects our decisions.

What I have come to realize is that angry people are more vulnerable to sin and making the wrong decisions, so the earlier you forgive, the better for you to let go and that way, you can avoid your anger transmitting into depression, hostility, self-pity or snide remarks that may end up hurting more people around you than you anticipate! So in other to avoid these, try not to let the sun go down on your anger and try to resolve whatever upsets you before going to bed. Does it matter whether we forgive or not, after-all there’s nothing wrong with holding on to anger, hurt and desire for revenge?  well, According to cardiologist Dave Montgomery “If you have a destructive reaction to anger, you are more likely to have heart attacks,” anger has been said to trigger heart attacks, accelerate coagulation that causes pain, increases the total cholesterol of the body, and may lead to death as we are often not in control of ourselves while angry, which means there’s a powerful connection between being able to forgive and our health and happiness.

The holy books did not preach against anger although it preaches against the sin we may commit whilst angry. Jesus Christ had His moments of anger, and it is in the holy books the only difference is that his anger did not stop him from winning souls, spreading the gospel, healing people, and being a gentle soul. As a matter of fact, God himself (who is without sin), is said to have gotten angry a few times in the bible, yet, He forgives us...  so who are you and who am I to hold a person in debt of their mistakes (especially when we know the possible risks our anger can trigger). Forgiveness is a choice and should be principal. You can choose to forgive, move on, and live in peace and happiness; or you can choose to remain angry, and throw away the good the Lord has blessed you with via your anger. Making mistakes is a regular part of life, nonetheless you should never allow yourself to be held back by your mistakes nor should you allow another pay for their mistakes forever!

I was an emotional wreck after my own experience, however, only after I made the decision to forgive was I able to have peace and live a fully healthy life again. See it is very possible to be happy again, you need to overcome and go on to be happy and you can only do this by leaving behind your past and therefore improving your well-being. Perhaps you have been the victim or someone had offended you or maybe there is something in your life for which you need to forgive yourself.  I guarantee you can find peace and happiness in your life by forgiving yourselves or others, letting go of your past and moving forward.  No one can do it for you, only you can.  It wasn’t easy for me, but I found that by forgiving, I was refusing to allow what happened to have power over me and that was the most powerful and healthy choice I could make.
So, for the love of God and for your own welfare, comfort and happiness I beseech you to forgive whoever has trespassed against you or wronged in any way, forgive yourself of everything as the Lord himself forgives you of your sins, leave your past behind and move forward.  

Until next time…. Forgiveness is Divine!

Vida Amorosa
Olori Amope xx

Be Intentional - Live On Purpose!

Intentionality allows God to use us to do the extraordinary through the ordinary - Trisha Davis

I thought I did know what kind of life I want to live, but in reality I was just allowing things to happen, situations to change, and moments to pass by. 

Then something happened that changed everything…..
After this event, expressing my feelings became a powerful means for me to connect with myself. For the first time, I became aware of my deepest desires, my purpose, my values, my hopes and dreams.  We all have unforeseen/unplanned situations in life that we may not be prepared for, but intentional living is something we determine to do irrespective of our circumstances. It has more to do with what we do with our life than what happens to us. We sometimes make plans but due to circumstances outside of our control, the said plans can be interrupted, delayed, or altered. It happens every day, from simple distractions that keep us from accomplishing what we may have planned for the day to major events that alter our lives.

I had the privilege to attend "The Ladies Fellowship" online meeting called “Girl Intentionally” (you can follow them HERE) in this meeting we discussed how to live Intentionally and the power of Intention and of course focusing on the Bible. We looked into the story of few women in the Bible who lived with Intention, women like Esther, Ruth, Mary. Click HERE for more on "Girl Intentionally". You need to take time out to seek God, to ask Him for direction for your life– Laying aside your plans for His plans. Not that God doesn’t care about our plans or our desires, He knows our heart, He knows our intentions and when our desires and intentions line-up with His, we are certain of great things regardless of our circumstances.
After the meeting, “Girl Intentionally” I was convinced and made a commitment to myself and made it my personal mission to live every day with Intention because my time here on Earth is too precious to live without purpose. As I began to put God first, I found that things seemed to fall into place, things I never expected or imagined. Not that it made everything easy or removed the challenges that I face on a daily basis, but now regardless of my circumstances I have peace, Joy and happiness. Now, my Living with Intention is based on my understanding of who God is and who He made me to be. You need to lay a proper foundation.

You need to realize that your life is made up of choices and opportunities, and you need to take advantage of the opportunities God made available to you. You don’t have to let the circumstances of your past negatively determine your life in the future; you have a choice in the matter. Do not be stuck in the same pattern of living that you have been for years; every day is a new opportunity, examine yourself and know who you are. Since the major events that happened in my life previously and recently, I have been spending  my time trying to figure out what happened, expressing and finding out about myself, I took a step back, analyze my life and realized that I had missed out on some things in life and if I continue like this I will be missing out on so many things. I am still on an incredibly windy journey to find my purpose and achieve my goals, of course it is not easy but I’m making progress. My support system is unbelievable, filled with families, friends and mentors who are helping me on my journey as I am now intentionally creating a life I love.

Here are my lesson learnt from "The Ladies Fellowship" meeting on living an Intentional life:
1. Define your Purpose and Dream big.
Identify what you want your life to communicate and contribute. Find a passion to live for that is bigger than you. Only consider the “whats” right now and not the “hows” (you’ll figure that out later). Focus on what you’ll be doing, not how you’re going to make it happen.
2. Set your goals.
Goals move us and goals shape us when you know what’s vital to you, Set goals that are directly in line with your defined purpose (Intention). By their very nature, they will introduce intentionality into your life.
3. Stay Focused.
The world we live in now is full of endless connectivity and distraction (social media I must say) that is begging for our attention practically every moment of the day. Turn off the distraction and live your life instead. Learn to remove unnecessary things that are robbing you of time and energy that could be better spent living intentionally.
4. Review and Refresh.
Make sure that your actions aligned with your values and your goals, Make sure that what you’re doing today is preparing you for the kind of person you want to be a year from now. Learn from like minded people, what can you do today to get you one step closer to that peaceful, happy life you’ve imagined for yourself? Go do it! 

So what about you? Are you living an Intentional life or planning to live an Intentional life? Are there changes you keep telling yourself you’ll make “when you have time” or “when the time is right?” Well, the time is now, make that decision to live with Intent, Let go and allow your intent to unfold. Irrespective of the unforeseen circumstances, challenges, or life changing events, we can still decide to live with intention. When you choose to live with Intention, you are basically deciding what’s important to you, and then making choices that honor what you decide is important. Living intentionally obliges us to move beyond circumstances, and rise above them, to keep our focus on our purpose in life. Seek God each day, take time out of your schedules and learn to rest in Him, you will find peace for your souls and learn to live with more intention.

Until next time, have the mind to live with purpose, focus! Decide to live your life.

Love Live and Be Intentional
Olori Amope xx